Rest in Peace Mary Marie Chapek-Halvorson

Last Thursday my brother David (in one of the pictures from the home we got Mom into a few weeks ago) was trying to get ahold of me at work (here in the Springs). Mom wasn't doing so well and the Hospice nurse was thinking this might be the beginning of her decline. I left my brother detailed instructions on how to get a message thru to me here, as it's not a normal base I'm working at. Friday morning he used those instructions to let me know that Moms primary Hospice nurse put her on 24 hour "Crisis Care", thinking that this was indeed her quick decline. She was on Morphine for the pain.

I grabbed a small bag with 2 sets of clothes and drove to Denver and parked my rental car, went to the Southwest counter and bought a 1-way ticket to Houston. I arrived at 9:30pm Friday night, and Dave and Greg (little and big brothers) picked me up at the airport and after a quick stop and McDonalds for a to-go meal (as I was RABID hungry) we went right to the home to see Mom.

I was actually stunned seeing her when I walked into her room. Three weeks ago when I left Houston she was still walking (albeit with a walker) and talking. This was no longer the case. I won't go into detail except to say that I think with her liver under attack and failing, her body was so full of toxins that her mind was already gone. She was breathing and that was about it. She had no reaction to voice or touch, other than a wet swab to the mouth (I think that is an involuntary reaction though). This was no longer the proud strong beautiful amazing woman I have known my entire life...cancer had taken all that from her. DAMN YOU CANCER, I HATE YOU LIKE NO OTHER!!

Even now I get tears in my eyes thinking about how ravaged she was by the cancer and how quickly near the end. It's SO not fair! She didn't deserve this (no one does)! She ate right, exercised, and was very devout Christian....1 year ago she would have wiped the floor wit the Energizer Bunny (seriously). At 83 years of age she made ME tired when I visited...she was still go go go! At 84 (her birthday this last March, and 1 year into her Stage 4 Ovarian Cancer diagnosis) she was still quite spry and pretty with it, except she just needed lots of naps. Three weeks ago her naps were much more, and her mind was definitely intermittently foggy...and she no longer had any interest in puzzles or crafts. She was just getting by. And as of this last weekend cancer had the final word.

She passed quietly Saturday morning June 2nd at 11:13am. We (Greg, David and I) were at her side. Her Oncologist had stopped her Chemo back in January after seeing her liver was now being attacked, and told to make her plans. Both of her Dr's had said that it's pretty well documented, and when the liver is compromised most people live four to six months. She made it 5 months after stopping Chemo, and about 14 months after her Stage 4 diagnosis. As a devout Christian she wasn't afraid to die, knowing she was going to be with God, and the rest of her siblings (only 1 of the 8 children are still living, her big sister Ruth).

Her passing was actually a blessing, as seeing her in this condition was heart-wrenching in the extreme! I really hope that somehow she could hear/sense that her boys were all with her at the end, but I can't say for sure...but I'd like to think that. She was a truly Amazing woman and the best mother anyone could have! She was more than a lioness with her cubs, I'd say she was like a mother Grizzly bear when one of hers was threatened. Her chosen profession was an RN...she went through nursing school in the mind `1950's, and did her final training at Chicago Cook Memorial hospital. As the head-nurse at the Hillbrook Nursing Home in Clancy Montana for almost 20 years, she was compassionate beyond measure. Those patients were HER mothers and fathers!

She had every good trait a person could have. She has lifelong friends all over the country including Canada, and I guarantee there are moist eyes on every one of them at the news of her passing. She was a TRULY good person. I can safely say that she will be dearly missed for the rest of our lives.

Rest now Mom, you have earned it. I pray you are watching over us and are now in peace and pain free, with your mother and father and brothers and sisters. Your job here on earth is done, you raised three pretty great kids (well, two anyway and also me).

I love you Mom and miss you dearly! You made me the person I am today, and I know my wife Jeannie thinks you did a pretty good job!

Goodbye Mom, I'll see you again one day.

Peace.

Mom and I down in Houston, March 2018

Happy Memorial Day!

Wow...a lot has happened in the last few weeks.

First on the list is today, Memorial Day, the official (to me anyway) beginning of summer! HOORAY FOR SUMMER!! And in the spirit of the day, taking some time to reflect on the veterans throughout our great country's history that gave us this day, and the freedom we continue to live in. To all my fellow vets out there I say thank you for your service!

Next...well, I guess I should cover my Mom and her continuing decline (expected). Her cancer is running unabated since her oncologist took her off of chemo back in January (due to it now having attacked her liver). My brother brought her back from Minnesota to his home in Texas so she would be close to family for her final time left. I traveled out there to take care of her while he and his family was to be away for the kids speech tournament (they both qualified for regionals). However Mom took a turn for the worse the week before and he decided not to go, and I flew out to provide help as best I could. And it was a good thing...turns out she needed more care than we can realistically can provide (she now needed 24 hour support).

 Here's Mom and I in the park by my brothers house...sitting on a bench during a nice park stroll

 (just thought I'd toss in a 'happy picture" before I continue).

We frantically looked for (and found) a place for her where they provide such care. We did NOT want to put her in some institution...we were looking for something more homey, and that's what we found.

 Moms room (the flowers were from big brothers family for Mothers day).

 The living room.

 A different angle in the living room, showing the other 4 ladies who are Moms new housemates.

 To the right is the front door, and on the other side of the railing is the large dining room table where everybody gathers for meals.

 Another view of the living room (that's Mom in the green blanket w/ my brother sitting by her).

 The dining room table is back behind the white fencing. The lady with her back to us is Vivi, and that's her mother Mary Eileen on the couch with her. My Moms name is also Mary, as is another of the other ladies (so there are THREE Marys here).

Here the nurses aids are doing exercises with their residents.

We are pretty pleased overall. The max capacity for this 'home' is 8...right now counting Mom there are only 5 residents (all ladies). There are 2 nurses aids on shift all day (7 to 7) and 1 all night. It's listed as a "Memory Care/Assisted Living" facility. It's literally a large 1 story house in a residential neighborhood. The owner has this home and 1 other that she runs, providing for a much more home-like setting than a typical nursing home/assisted living facility can provide. It's exactly what we were looking for! As a family we all know pretty much what nursing homes are, as my parents were half owners with another couple of a nursing home long ago. Mom and the other lady were both RN's and were the only 2 nurses (they did have a LPN on each shift to assist them as I seem to recall).

And so...I can only tell you that the day we brought her here to live was a VERY hard day for the both of us. But Mom was having a 'good' day mentally and really took it very well (we did not of course). The home is mere minutes from my little bro's work, and about 15 from his house. He and his wife visit daily which is a really great thing! Her life since then is full of ups and downs (as expected). Her liver is under attack and you can tell that her body is being overrun with toxins that aren't being filtered out by her liver (likely it's working as best it can under the circumstances). We all know HOW this all ends, it's just the WHEN. Back in Jan when she was taken off chemo her Dr. said that most people when their liver is attacked only live 4 to 6 months. She is currently nearing the end of her 5th month since that diagnosis. Her Hospice nurse has visited her several times since she moved in, and has informed us all what of what to expect in the times ahead.  

OK. That's where things are at with Mom. It's certainly heartbreaking to see how cancer decimates such a strong vibrant woman. There are times when life really sucks...and this is one of them. It's SO not fair...but I guess that's just life. As the famous quote goes, "none of us will get out of it alive".

So now to shift 180 degrees (from sad to happy)....we need to mention "The Giro"! Well, "happy" may not be appropriate, depending on your view. It surely is "interesting"! On Friday Froomey came back from the dead and did a Floyd Landis attack and won the day, taking the Pink jersey away from Simon Yates! NOBODY really believed this was possible, but there you go...apparently it is possible. He attacked from 80k out on a hard climb, going "all in", taking a HUGE gamble that paid off like only a HUGE gamble can. His opposition watched him ride away, likely believing they would catch him before the day was out. That turned out not to be the case. Whatever your thoughts on Chris Froome are, he proved he's one of the best descenders in the peleton (again) as he powered away not only on the climb but also on the descent! He continued to gain time and by the end of the day had the Pink jersey for his efforts, which we would defend on Saturday, and ride to the finish yesterday still in Pink.

Now there are just a few questions remaining. 1: will this victory stand, or will it be stripped after the CAS finally decides his fate after his positive doping test from last years Vuelta? 2: is this kind of victory actually POSSIBLE? I surely don't need to remind you about Floyd's famous attack back in 2006, when we all watched (with our rose-colored-glasses) thinking how amazing it was! Turns out it was a doping-enabled sham, and the old adage "if it looks too good to be true, it probably is" was never more true. So how are we to view this newest "too good to be true" effort? It's not like his (and his team) superhuman efforts of recent years aren't in question...as they are. HOW is it that he and his team are so "Lance-like"? Stronger than all others...when every other team has only their GC guy left, there's Froome with 3 or 4 guys just destroying the rest of the best. We've seen that before with Postal and Discovery, and it was also too good to be true.

And so...Froome will go into this years Tour with a Giro win under his belt. And you can be he and Team Sky will be a true force to be reckoned with (again). If he can stay upright and healthy, well...who will stay with him? We shall see soon enough.

Enough on that subject. In somewhat related news (but GOOD news), FATTY IS BACK! Yes, he has returned to his blog after an 18 month hiatus. HOORAY!!! I've missed his blog a lot during that break, but I left his link in my "blogs I like" list (on the right of my page) all this time, just KNOWING that one day he would return...and he HAS! Welcome back Fatty!  You were missed more than you know!

And finally, I"m off to Colorado Springs tomorrow (Tuesday) for 2 weeks of work (that MIGHT turn back into 3, we shall just see how this plays out). Here at the home-job we have been preparing for a Payload Transportation Mission (where we fly with our gigantic container to a factory, plop an enormously expensive Government spacecraft inside, and bring it to it's Launch Base for final processing and then launch). We load the container on the aircraft the night of 20 June, flying north to the factory the next night. So IF my trip were to be extended to 3 weeks I'd fly home on Friday the 15th, and just have that few days before I fly again (the mission will be less than a week away). If I fly home as currently scheduled (on Monday the 11th) then I'll have more time at home before flying away again. I'm ok either way.

And with that, I bid you all a good day, and hope you had a wonderful long Memorial Day weekend! Summer is HERE!!

Cheers!